YWValues: Good Works
When you're sixteen in a small town, it's difficult to recognize need. It's easy to think "there's somebody suffering somewhere in the world, but it's probably not on this continent."
There really are people on other continents who don't have the things we have, and there are things we can do to help, but when the people you want to help are that far away, to avoid wasted goods and energy it's best to leave decisions about what they need to people familiar with local stresses and issues. In your home town, though, you can BE the expert on local need.
I've been in need. Summers were the most difficult because I wasn't receiving my (ridiculously small) stipend, and I had to try to stretch my savings through until September, when it started up again. I still had a lot of work to do, and even when I took time off of my real job to look for paying work nobody would hire me. I worked myself ragged, and all I got for it were depleted bank accounts, raw digestive tract, and more stress. I would go to church to lose my own worries in some big-picture thinking, but the ward was running a food drive. There were days when it would bring me to tears - to be asked to give food when I needed it myself. Even now, it's acutely painful seeing need around me that I'm not in a position to help.
I don't have money, and I don't have a lot of time, but I can spare a little, now and then. And I learned that being in need hurts your soul. It makes you feel unworthy and useless. Charity from people who knew me was in some ways harder to accept and made me more vulnerable, but it also had the potential to help heal the damage that need caused by showing me that society wouldn't cast me off quite yet.
I love Jesus's example of generosity from the New Testament, and I love what the Book of Mormon says about sharing of our substance, but all of my finer feelings about good works come from Charles Dickens. Between Bleak House and "A Christmas Carol," we begin to understand how to walk among our fellow man and bear each-other's burdens.
Beginning with the first session, the women's session, the April 2016 General Conference turned its focus often to the good we can do in our communities. Those needs become more obvious when our communities accept refugees, but even without that influx of permanent guests, the only way to see a need and fill it is to walk among us. Talk to people. Be vulnerable. Listen to them. Embrace mitleid. Some of the most powerful words I've ever heard were, "that could just as easily have happened to me."
And some of the most galling comments I've ever heard were, "And their [situation] just reminded me about how blessed I am!" *sniff-sniff* As if somebody else's pain or misery only exists to allow you a bit of smugness. *rolls eyes* Give or serve wisely, but without judgment. It is not our place to decide whether the needy are "deserving." Remember Divine Nature and Individual Worth. Everyone matters. If you can't love them yet, then love Jesus, and he'll help you.
Close the distance. If you really want to feed the homeless or give rest for the weary, if you want to make somebody's life better, do it by being IN IT. Instead of using your bank account to throw money at them, use your body, your time, your attention and emotions. Do it selflessly. Surrender your need to be thanked or compensated: it will only make you bitter, and it will turn your kindness toxic.
Wherever you are in life, and whatever your talents or personality, I have faith that we can all bring some light into the world. It's difficult for me to believe that applies to me, because so much of my personality makes serving difficult, and because even when I try, I often fail. But I continue to hope that even I can find some way to serve.
There really are people on other continents who don't have the things we have, and there are things we can do to help, but when the people you want to help are that far away, to avoid wasted goods and energy it's best to leave decisions about what they need to people familiar with local stresses and issues. In your home town, though, you can BE the expert on local need.
I've been in need. Summers were the most difficult because I wasn't receiving my (ridiculously small) stipend, and I had to try to stretch my savings through until September, when it started up again. I still had a lot of work to do, and even when I took time off of my real job to look for paying work nobody would hire me. I worked myself ragged, and all I got for it were depleted bank accounts, raw digestive tract, and more stress. I would go to church to lose my own worries in some big-picture thinking, but the ward was running a food drive. There were days when it would bring me to tears - to be asked to give food when I needed it myself. Even now, it's acutely painful seeing need around me that I'm not in a position to help.
I don't have money, and I don't have a lot of time, but I can spare a little, now and then. And I learned that being in need hurts your soul. It makes you feel unworthy and useless. Charity from people who knew me was in some ways harder to accept and made me more vulnerable, but it also had the potential to help heal the damage that need caused by showing me that society wouldn't cast me off quite yet.
I love Jesus's example of generosity from the New Testament, and I love what the Book of Mormon says about sharing of our substance, but all of my finer feelings about good works come from Charles Dickens. Between Bleak House and "A Christmas Carol," we begin to understand how to walk among our fellow man and bear each-other's burdens.
Beginning with the first session, the women's session, the April 2016 General Conference turned its focus often to the good we can do in our communities. Those needs become more obvious when our communities accept refugees, but even without that influx of permanent guests, the only way to see a need and fill it is to walk among us. Talk to people. Be vulnerable. Listen to them. Embrace mitleid. Some of the most powerful words I've ever heard were, "that could just as easily have happened to me."
And some of the most galling comments I've ever heard were, "And their [situation] just reminded me about how blessed I am!" *sniff-sniff* As if somebody else's pain or misery only exists to allow you a bit of smugness. *rolls eyes* Give or serve wisely, but without judgment. It is not our place to decide whether the needy are "deserving." Remember Divine Nature and Individual Worth. Everyone matters. If you can't love them yet, then love Jesus, and he'll help you.
Close the distance. If you really want to feed the homeless or give rest for the weary, if you want to make somebody's life better, do it by being IN IT. Instead of using your bank account to throw money at them, use your body, your time, your attention and emotions. Do it selflessly. Surrender your need to be thanked or compensated: it will only make you bitter, and it will turn your kindness toxic.
Wherever you are in life, and whatever your talents or personality, I have faith that we can all bring some light into the world. It's difficult for me to believe that applies to me, because so much of my personality makes serving difficult, and because even when I try, I often fail. But I continue to hope that even I can find some way to serve.
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