Matches

In real life, I'm a miserable matchmaker. In fiction writing, I'm certain this is a disadvantage. Although people in real life exert their independence constantly while characters generally do whatever you tell them to, characters who are destined to meet in any significant manner must have some point upon which they meet. Filmmakers often still use the "meet-cute," or some slightly more sophisticated variation, but I tend to put more weight on propinquity. A meet-cute depends completely on instant attraction, and in that sense reveals a truly appalling unreality. How many comical moments have you survived which actually put you in any kind of mood to attract a potential mate? How often have you actually developed a lasting relationship with someone whom you have only met by chance briefly?

Propinquity seems a more scientific and realistic standard. For two people to form some lasting emotional bond some sense of nearness seems necessary, or at least a consistency and coincidence of habits or habitats. In real life I have noticed that couples emerge from church groups, college or high school classes, offices, or websites both frequent. They see each other a few times, meet finally, meet intentionally, and then the rest emerges from that constant nearness.